Needed advice for Nafa Junior Music

[chamois]

Hi,

I cannot understand why parents are so "bothered" about kids these days.
In my days, many parents no marni for extra tuition classes, most of my classmates never pay money to feed commercial tuition classes. Many parents too busy to closely supervise kidz (it means we had a lot of time to play and do ECA that we like! ), even if I had piano lessons when I was young, mummy too busy surviving (work and earn bread) to see how I doing.

Mom let me learned piano bcos she imposing her dream on me but nowadays I think back, I think it's very expensive, if I dun have enuff money I will still think twice if I have to send kids to learn piano.

Nowadays, why soo many parents send kids to learn piano and have high expectations?
Frankly I feel that there's no need to be formally trained in music to enjoy music. You just need to buy some good speakers, and good music albums or those genre of music recordings which you like. You can also attend live concerts. Even if one learns the language of a music instrument, he/she may still not reach the perfection in technique to perform live for others to enjoy, might be better listening to quality recordings.

IMHO, parents, there's no need to pressure your kid, they either have it or don't have it, if they kind of don't have it and you still willing to sponsor your kid to learn, then please let them enjoy the learning experience, if they want perfection themselves, they will push themselves to perform and scale greater heights.

I feel that whatever one choose to do in life, you have to like it first, this is only the entry level passport. Discipline and hard work have to come after that to attain technique perfection. Whether you get good mentors during the growing development period really depends on your good fortune and luck.
With these 3 factors, and perseverence, something good will surely materialize.

 

[chamois]

Kiasuma, do tell us your decision. My son is younger than your daughter - so I'm interested to follow the progress of your daughter. I'm thrilled to hear that she is picking up piano fast. I'm now thinking whether I want to get my younger son to also pick up the piano or another instrument. Piano is good because it is versatile - however I don't want to create competition and comparison between my children, which may happen if they play the same instrument.

Cheez, why don't you consider let your son try the violin instead of piano?
Violin + piano makes great music together !!
Me and 3 music friends(2 guy violinist, 1 gal piano&violin teacher) have this common opinion that boys learn violin, gals learn piano. hmm...Is this a popular view... ?

 

[kiasuma]

Oh that is SWEET!
I hope your child loves music thru out her life. An invaluable God given gift music is.

Thanks ShredCow! Good to see you again! For now she is still very excited about it, kept asking me when is the course starting. Really hope this excitment will keep up. :lol:

 

[kiasuma]

chamois - Thanks for sharing.

 

[Kengz]

Guys guys guys, I think this topic got sidetracked along the way. Good to hear everyone's opinions and experiences but I think her main concern is the teaching system in NAFA...

Ironically, I too, am not able to offer advice. Hopefully someone can step up to the plate?

 

[DoubleBlade]

Me and 3 music friends(2 guy violinist, 1 gal piano&violin teacher) have this common opinion that boys learn violin, gals learn piano. hmm...Is this a popular view... ?

It is indeed a popular view , but it makes my blood boil when people come up to me and say that piano is a girl's instrument....

 

[chamois]

It is indeed a popular view , but it makes my blood boil when people say that piano is a girl's instrument....

No need to boil your blood. I am girl, studied piano, but switched to violin.
But I do think piano music are largely gentler music (Liszt has some delightfully more "violent/lively" sounding pieces), and more suitable for night listening(nachtmusik).
Violin music is stronger and I feel that the tone is richer and more expressive, it has an analog quality unlike the discrete quality of piano keys music. Also violin/strings have a premium role in all orchestras, i.e. there are more jobs for strings than piano in orchestras.
The violin is a very ancient instrument, much much more older than piano.

Side-track: Last evening, I was browsing a colleague's child PSLE Primary 6 English workbook. There was a passage about Beethoven...Poor Beethoven was forced by his violent Daddy to learn piano so he can make music and earn more money for the family. Whenever Beethoven made a mistake in playing, his Daddy will boxed his ears. Later on, Beethoven also went on to study violin and organ............
I wonder did Beethoven became deaf bcos his Daddy boxed his ears... ?

 

[ShredCow]

chamois, at the end of the day, we all can agree to 1 thing, that more often than not, kids/children don't know what they want and don't know what is best for them. Parents have their responsibility to push their child to excel. Left alone, most kids watch tv, play and go out. Thats it. A special few will be interested in arts or some skill.

But to box some kid up to practice piano? To force and force and force? Nope, should not be.

Every child is different, every parent should know how much pushing is required. Also, every household has different needs.

 

[viper]

I was forced to learn piano when I was young.When I told my parents I realised the piano wasn't really my kind of instrument they didn't listen and continued my lessons.

I would say if your child mentions anything about piano not being suitable for him/her , pls talk to your child and try to understand because there's really no point forcing.

I think my parents do regret not listening to me last time because they can tell I am having much more fun with the guitar.

 

[chamois]

I feel that the parent no need to push the kid to excel, but the coach/teacher should have the right instead, bcos the kid and the teacher/coach is IN the field, not the parent (even though the parent is the fees sponsor and therefore often feels the right to get really very involved to pressure the kid). The parent sometimes have unrealistic expectations while the teacher possibly has a more insightful judgement on the child's potential, skill technique and problems.

It is a special case if the parent is dual role also as the music teacher him/herself for his/her own kid. Often the family environment already has much more musical influence than the average family environment.

Before pressure/pushing the kid, the basic should be the kid likes doing it in the first place. Not just bcos you may kill his/her interest, it is not possible to attain perfection in technique just in performing technique alone without the sensitivity and style in artistry.

As a former school artistic gymnast (extreme pressure training) and freestyle figure skater. I dare say pressure training with the correct guidance can indeed produce sterling results, but should be preceded by a more than cursory interest in the topic in the first place from the kid.

 

[ShredCow]

Passion required to excel. Indeedly truely right.

 

[chamois]

we all can agree to 1 thing, that more often than not, kids/children don't know what they want and don't know what is best for them. Parents have their responsibility to push their child to excel. Left alone, most kids watch tv, play and go out. Thats it. A special few will be interested in arts or some skill.

Heehee...actually I have many working adult friends who also don't know what they want in life, so we are not really better than kids anyway.
Some of them have some unrealised dreams, so they in turn try to force their unfulfilled aspirations on their kids.

Actually a lot of people float along in life. Nothing wrong what. Love and be happy. C'est la vie.
Some do excel, those are the ones who have decided on something they want and go for it ALL the way. (But have you notice some artists or musicians are like crazy people? )

 

[ShredCow]

well chamois, of we all love to float along life. Who wouldn't want to? Have an easy life. Just go with the flow. However, when life does come around and slap you in the face with bills, work, death, etc... can you handle that? No need to be paranoid but be ready/prepared.

As for the crazy musicians/artistes, I say, well, it is not the norm. Media loves such people (entertainers they be called) and so we get to see a lot of the little happening.

 

[chamois]

Then don't study music lor. Extra expense and least prospect for ROI.
Money is never enuff if you keep counting.

It's possible to float along for most people in Singapore especially as a developed society the population is largely middle class already, literacy rate is high, even ITE grads get jobs easily. No need to be too rich to float along - follow the gumshoe route: study, get certificate, get job, get steady income.
I remembered I read that the statistics even show that more Singaporeans are growing rich, more are buying cars( oklah also bcos the recent price more affordable), AND more going overseas to study too!

While so many already quite comfortably rich enough Chinese parents are counting costs of having kids, some less well-off parents have already given birth to 2 kids liao.

 

[kiasuma]

I would say if your child mentions anything about piano not being suitable for him/her , pls talk to your child and try to understand because there's really no point forcing.

Thanks for your advice viper! Will keep this in mind. When the going gets tough beyond the level acceptable by her, i"m prepared for her to slow down. Only thing is I have to manage her expectations properly, that slowing down does not mean she is not good, everyone deserves a break. This is another enlightenment from another mom.
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[Cheez]

Kiasuma, congrats to your daughter! From the sound of it, she is pretty excited about the piano - that's always a good start. If she's disciplined, she'll go far. Actually, you don't have to slow her down or speed her up - just leave to her own pace. My dad just passed away - so in the midst of everything my son had to stop his piano lessons for about 2 months (mainly because I'm the teacher!). Just started him again last Saturday - he forgotten a lot of stuffs, but I'm glad he picked it up again after 15 minutes. I had to "slow down" - go back a number of lessons just to make sure I don't go ahead of him.

Chamois, I'm not so sure if there's a gender preference on piano or violin. If we look at the general classical pianists out there, the gender ratio is pretty much split in the middle. Anyway, my son picked the piano over the violin. Also easier - since I can teach him piano but I can't play violin. My other son is also getting interested in the piano although he is still too young. I'm trying to let him learn a different instrument so they don't compete. Don't know - maybe classical guitar. For violin, I will have to suffer the "cat-screaming" sound for the first few years...

 

[kiasuma]

My dad just passed away

cheez - I'm so sorry to hear your recent loss. Sunshine fades and shadows fall, but sweet remembrance outlasts all.

My mom passed away 3yrs ago, while I was pregnant with my 2nd gal, she never get the chance to see her 2nd granddaughter. Fond memories of her linger every day, even till today.

so in the midst of everything my son had to stop his piano lessons for about 2 months (mainly because I'm the teacher!). Just started him again last Saturday - he forgotten a lot of stuffs, but I'm glad he picked it up again after 15 minutes. I had to "slow down" - go back a number of lessons just to make sure I don't go ahead of him.

I'm sure with your patience guidance, both your son will benefit great from it.

Kiasuma, congrats to your daughter! From the sound of it, she is pretty excited about the piano - that's always a good start. If she's disciplined, she'll go far. Actually, you don't have to slow her down or speed her up - just leave to her own pace.

Thanks Cheez! I will leave it to her own pace, will come in to the picture only when she needs a 'shoulder to cry on'. :lol: