Goodbye Princess (original)

[Soldi]

First song ive ever written
and i dont sing normally
and im 14
so dont be harsh :lol:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JfwwfCkQy58

the better recorded version would be here

http://www.myspace.com/cupidsheartbreak

 

[Soldi]

The Lyrics

Princess..
Take your troubles out
i just want to be alone now
i would like you to leave now

so go..
dont you look behind
i just wanna see you walk away
but i dont wanna see you cry

why did this have to end this way
everything seemed so far away

Goodbye Princess
I just wanted you to know
that i dont love you anymore
Goodbye princess
i didnt mean to hurt you
every story has to end

Move on..
forget the past
i know its not easy
i know it'll be hard

Try..
dig deeper down into yourself
find the answer .. within the lies


Goodbye Princess
I just wanted you to know
that i dont love you anymore
Goodbye princess
i didnt mean to hurt you
well .. this is the end

 

[shaneypants]

You're off to a good start. It's pretty ok considering it's your first penned song. I'm 14 too and when I started out, I sucked. Keep working on it. =)

 

[daryl]

It's good for a first attempt. The lyrics are a little cliched, typical pop song material. You could try omiting certain words such as princess, love, cry. I do like "find the answer .. within the lies", quite a nice line.

Melody and rhythm wise you could try exploring more options, it tends to get a little dull. All in all, good try! Keep writing cause that's the only way you're going to improve, I hope to see better stuff from you in the future.