I strongly believe that one can still convey messages and help others without lacing words with sarcasm. The intention can be well meaning, but it will all be pointless if there is any sarcasm and a holier than thou (limpeh ka ler kong) attitude.
You must be a true idealist if you believe that inflections such as sarcasm and cynicism do not occur in everyday communications, regardless of age or social standing. But you go a bit too far in implying that sarcasm conveys a holier than thou (limbehkalukong) attitude. I can safely say that discussions here are nowhere near that stage of condescension ..unless of course you have one heckava fragile psyche.
Yes, we all had it tough in the earlier years where people all learn through hard knocks and such. But times change and things evolve. What worked back then might not work as well at this day of age. Everyone needs to learn how to adapt and evolve.
Yes times change and some attitudes do evolve..for better or worse is debatable. What worked back then may not work now...but then again, what is not working now needs to be looked at again. Why throw out the baby with the bathwater?
Just imagine if all a teacher does is to tell his student "you're a stupid piece of crap. you're good for nothing". What are the odds of the kid growing up feeling motivated to improve?
You are obviously too young to have experienced the classroom culture of my generation and those before. My teachers do yell such insults at us, and even bang us on the head if we talk back. Did we grow up any more handicapped or warped by such "abuse"?? I thought we were the "pioneer" generation..forged in the fires of hardship and adversity. Your current generation of leaders come mainly from that generation whom teachers freely called "stupid fools and crap". Did we cry and run complain to mummy ? (The kids actually do that today !!) We just grit our teeth, and mumbled under our breath.."we'll show you, you bastard !"
The funny thing is..I am really thankful for the tough love those teachers showed us. I really wish kids today can experience some of that. Maybe then they wouldn't be the self centred wimps we see today.
In my line of work, I can safely tell you that way will just kill many kids' future. Of course, some people will say that it is reverse psychology. There might be one or two who are able to convert that negative energy into motivation to succeed. But I can tell you that it will mostly destroy a kid's self belief. There are researches done to prove that reverse psychology has more repercussions than good outcomes.
I'd agree with you if we are referring to kids in kindergarten and schools. But on this forum we are dealing not with kids but young adults. Many either have done...or are about to enter NS where in spite of the country club facilities and gourmet food, they still get verbally abused by their officers. How come no soft soft treatment ? I thought NS is supposed to prepare a young man to face life?
So when we debate or discuss issues here, there is no benefit in behaving like we are at an SDU match making party...try kopitiam...with it's fair share of cussing, spitting, and crude behaviour. That's reality man. better learn to live with it.
IMHO, a person works best and will improve more if he/she is encouraged and nurtured. That way, he/she will grow up more self motivated.
You are essentially saying the carrot works better than the stick. Numerous psychological studies, government stats, and corporate models will say you are wrong. To make that donkey run, you need both judicious measures of the stick and the carrot.
hahaha...take for example the government's current attempt to make people have more babies. So many incentives and gentle persuasion, still no progress. But if they pass a law tomorow doubling the income tax of people who don't marry or who are married but have no babies...see what happens.