my unhappiness about my "band"
- Thread starter Gr3y
- Start date
I definitely agree on what everyone says, about how you must get along in order to play music together, or it will not be very comfortable.
However, someone earlier on talked about how he was a beginner drummer and how angry the bandleader got at him. I hate to say that you are being quite unreasonable.
Another thing you must realize is, if other members are significantly better than you, and the band basically requires more than what you can offer, then it won't really work either. Of course, jamming with people better than you helps, but in terms of being in a band, it will make others understandably unhappy if you keep screwing up and you can't keep up with them.
my 2cents
However, someone earlier on talked about how he was a beginner drummer and how angry the bandleader got at him. I hate to say that you are being quite unreasonable.
Another thing you must realize is, if other members are significantly better than you, and the band basically requires more than what you can offer, then it won't really work either. Of course, jamming with people better than you helps, but in terms of being in a band, it will make others understandably unhappy if you keep screwing up and you can't keep up with them.
my 2cents
Crawldaddy
New member
Hmm.
He bro, I totally know how you feel, especially when one bandmate has a very different musical direction, or is not in sync with the rest of the band. Truth is, musician are like trains and buses... another one will eventually come along.
No doubt the search will be long and hard, I've come to realise that the best way forward is to keep things simple, and to be as open-minded as possible in terms of accepting people for who they are and what their influences are like.
I don't think you're unreasonable in terms of expectations for one's fellow musicians, but as a kind reminder.. sometimes.. just a little patience and persuasion goes a long way.
And thanks so much for helping me out with my booster... will treat you makan. :wink:
He bro, I totally know how you feel, especially when one bandmate has a very different musical direction, or is not in sync with the rest of the band. Truth is, musician are like trains and buses... another one will eventually come along.
No doubt the search will be long and hard, I've come to realise that the best way forward is to keep things simple, and to be as open-minded as possible in terms of accepting people for who they are and what their influences are like.
I don't think you're unreasonable in terms of expectations for one's fellow musicians, but as a kind reminder.. sometimes.. just a little patience and persuasion goes a long way.
And thanks so much for helping me out with my booster... will treat you makan. :wink:
G
Guest
Guest
re: Drummer available..
im interested in drumming fer u guys..
anyone needs me?
im interested in drumming fer u guys..
anyone needs me?
RudimentalDrummer
Moderator
Hahaha Ys - must be saying me lah...Kekekeke
I think you should read properly - yes I'm a beginner drummer - but I must also be able to play in good time and pretty well - or else why did my Band-Leader wanted me to play in the Concert in the 1st place....correct - there will be many people there watching also.
Yes I was angry not feeling good - because My Band Leader needed a Lead Guitarist very badly (and a good one of course in a Blues Band)...but that is no reason to scould me for I did nothing wrong - I'm not out of time and I do listen to all songs before preparing for Jam each week (It just because he is afraid that the lead guitarist will leave the band though he was angry he didn't dare to say him)....then next week my leader tells me "SOrry I was just scoulding you las week, in spite you did nothing wrong was because I am angry with the lead-guitarists as he was not playing as what he wanted him to play (maybe guitarist not in good mood that day)......but look - how can like that lah...
If leader is angry with Guitarist tell him straight on the face - not at me...that's not fair to me.
Now who is unreasinable...think about it
I do not think that most of my band members are better than me - we probably are at the same level ....I've been there 4 months...learn about 60 songs (all new to me - but I listen everyday & practice) - I remember the songs after that, practice it well, no problem playing - but my other band members who had been there so long before me dont listen to the MP3 songs sent to them, can forget how a songs goes at time and when I play with them for 4 months now - of course I improve my playing remember them in the pocket-
So may times, I feel down - when the song get worst than last time when we play - WHY? - never practice, never listen..but that's ok with me...I still appreciate cause I gain the experience there and it was my 1st band...
I have to leave not because I can't play - because I cant turn up for the Concert with them which falls on same day as the Drum Festival (1st time in Asia - and I already bought the tickets)...I mean look at it this way = there was no give & take - I did not absence myself for 4 months every week - but my drumfest tickets was bought so long ago - and they knew - it just that the concert was 3 weeks before actual date - then where is the give & take - respect is a 2 way thing - it doesn't mean BandLeader says it all - it depends on reasonableness here.
PS: - NO wonder he tells me quite some time ago - If you are good oneday - you will change, you will develop attitude, you will leave the band.... but I know whats the real reason now - he just want people to obey & listen - not whether we practice and play well or not - then how can my band move up?......
To me, commitment is all bandmates must improve over time - and not don't listen dont practice but Jam jam jam for years and years - for what - If objective is to jam - where is the ultimate drive to play better to gig....the band becomes stagnent then....waste of time too
I think you should read properly - yes I'm a beginner drummer - but I must also be able to play in good time and pretty well - or else why did my Band-Leader wanted me to play in the Concert in the 1st place....correct - there will be many people there watching also.
Yes I was angry not feeling good - because My Band Leader needed a Lead Guitarist very badly (and a good one of course in a Blues Band)...but that is no reason to scould me for I did nothing wrong - I'm not out of time and I do listen to all songs before preparing for Jam each week (It just because he is afraid that the lead guitarist will leave the band though he was angry he didn't dare to say him)....then next week my leader tells me "SOrry I was just scoulding you las week, in spite you did nothing wrong was because I am angry with the lead-guitarists as he was not playing as what he wanted him to play (maybe guitarist not in good mood that day)......but look - how can like that lah...
If leader is angry with Guitarist tell him straight on the face - not at me...that's not fair to me.
Now who is unreasinable...think about it
I do not think that most of my band members are better than me - we probably are at the same level ....I've been there 4 months...learn about 60 songs (all new to me - but I listen everyday & practice) - I remember the songs after that, practice it well, no problem playing - but my other band members who had been there so long before me dont listen to the MP3 songs sent to them, can forget how a songs goes at time and when I play with them for 4 months now - of course I improve my playing remember them in the pocket-
So may times, I feel down - when the song get worst than last time when we play - WHY? - never practice, never listen..but that's ok with me...I still appreciate cause I gain the experience there and it was my 1st band...
I have to leave not because I can't play - because I cant turn up for the Concert with them which falls on same day as the Drum Festival (1st time in Asia - and I already bought the tickets)...I mean look at it this way = there was no give & take - I did not absence myself for 4 months every week - but my drumfest tickets was bought so long ago - and they knew - it just that the concert was 3 weeks before actual date - then where is the give & take - respect is a 2 way thing - it doesn't mean BandLeader says it all - it depends on reasonableness here.
PS: - NO wonder he tells me quite some time ago - If you are good oneday - you will change, you will develop attitude, you will leave the band.... but I know whats the real reason now - he just want people to obey & listen - not whether we practice and play well or not - then how can my band move up?......
To me, commitment is all bandmates must improve over time - and not don't listen dont practice but Jam jam jam for years and years - for what - If objective is to jam - where is the ultimate drive to play better to gig....the band becomes stagnent then....waste of time too
RE: To YS
The way - Ys - talks sounds like hes talking about my drummer. Through all, we always try to tell her to improve improve improve, study structure, practices rolls and stuffs, blah blah blah and sometimes even scold her but abit too harshly, but, we all still love her. She does improve when she really concentrates and she is so commited to the band. 8)
So patience and perseverence (I dont know how to spell it) are also key qualitys in overall band improvement.
You have to put up with one anothers arguements sometimes, back down when u have to, realise that sometimes you are wrong, then later on in the week you make up and go get coffee together again then laugh about it. :lol:
Have to be able to wait for one another to improve, although some might take longer than others, you must have patience not to get angry with them, but you may give them a little push.
But let me stress that, even thought committment is important, it doesnt overlook musical skills. the 2 must come together, and this is the reason for some bands that make it and some who do not.
In a band:
Commitment = The solid bond and friendship amongst the members
Musical skill = The serious side of being in a band
The way - Ys - talks sounds like hes talking about my drummer. Through all, we always try to tell her to improve improve improve, study structure, practices rolls and stuffs, blah blah blah and sometimes even scold her but abit too harshly, but, we all still love her. She does improve when she really concentrates and she is so commited to the band. 8)
So patience and perseverence (I dont know how to spell it) are also key qualitys in overall band improvement.
You have to put up with one anothers arguements sometimes, back down when u have to, realise that sometimes you are wrong, then later on in the week you make up and go get coffee together again then laugh about it. :lol:
Have to be able to wait for one another to improve, although some might take longer than others, you must have patience not to get angry with them, but you may give them a little push.
But let me stress that, even thought committment is important, it doesnt overlook musical skills. the 2 must come together, and this is the reason for some bands that make it and some who do not.
In a band:
Commitment = The solid bond and friendship amongst the members
Musical skill = The serious side of being in a band
Gr3y
New member
i think my this little thread did enlighten quite alot of people especially myself when not only my case study was discussed upon but i'm very glad i'm reading other ppl's precious experience and how abt doing things the right way in a band. thanks alot to those who taught me and esp those tt pm me something encouraging!
Gr3y
Gr3y
XLayaR
New member
To put it simply.....Try talking nicely to your mates and seriously discuss your unhappiness....If you still cant settle your differences, then split lor
No point being in a band where you're unhappy. Also think about what you wanna do.....To sell or not to sell, that is the question
No point being in a band where you're unhappy. Also think about what you wanna do.....To sell or not to sell, that is the question
