"take your pick. Me or your band?"

paganified

paganified

New member
Once upon a time.
There was a band.
The band is very close.
Their journey went smoothly.
Then one day, a member got hitched.
The rest realised that his commitment changed.
At times, didnt attend jamming sessions because his partner says no, dont go.
At times, didnt turn up band meetings because his partner says i want more time with you.
It came to a certain point when his partner says
"take your pick. Me or your band?"

What would you do?
spill.

it doesnt concern me.
Its a situation i happen to take notice today cause im sooo free.
ok stop asking. hahahaha
 
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Kick the band mate out since it would never be me. Learn to deal with your girlfriend or i'd never trust you with anything else. I'd never date anyone who would pit them against my music.
 
If that kinda Q arise...i think u shud look for a new partner.
Definitely not understandin,definitely not THE one,definitely False....
 
eh mak cik you so free ah?

ahaha.I say ditch the partner.
Afterall,the band came first then the partner what.

And whoever the partner is,
tell the whoever to tanam her.Waste of time.
 
Life is such that when oneself came to the crossroad, priorities are shifted.Normally an understanding soulmate/partner will try to comprehend the situation and mature minds will probably worked something out.

Nevertheless,it's hard to allocate fair time between the parties concerned..band and partner..eventually one of it had to be given a lesser time and in the long run..probably sacrifice..

so the onus is on the person concerned...is his/her band going forward or is the relationship between his/her partner worth it all..it is VERY DIFFICULT to get the best of both worlds..the ones who got it are the lucky ones..

i have seen fellow pro musicians friends who have the career/stability in their working lifes but having failed marriages/relationships and talented musicians who gave up the music career/business but have a healthy marriage/relationships...

at the end of the day...it's about making the choices that makes you happy..
 
errr

IF ME UH, i'll kick the bandmate out. seriously. if the bandmate chose to be with his/her partner. when his/her partner doesnt even want him to be with the band. or... i'll ask him/her FIND ANOTHER CHICK or guy.
 
Hell,
At least theres a choice.
what choice did I have?
oh well, things you do for love.

taken all the factors into consideration.
both could be a liable path to take.

If the significant other is someone you're still uncertain of, I would opt to stick with the band. Given the situation that the significant is someone you see in the future bearing your kids, I would choose the later.

Still it is funny how someone whom you love so much would stop you from doing the thing you love.

Jealousy? Envy? Or maybe just a case of insecurities.

matter not, the question is;
why should one hand travel a greater distant just to clap?
such actions will just bring anger in the victim thus bringing forth the need to get even.
which would then lead the significant other to retaliate.
The cycle repeats itself till one of them breaks.
If the other refuse to piece the broken parts together, thats the end.
turns out to be a lose-lose situation.

then again, you can always have a balanced and well-planned schedule.
It helps alot if your set time aside equally for play and romance not forgetting work of course.
If they are others who did it, what makes you(methaporicly speaking) any different?
Excuses are for the weak.
 
"matter not, the question is;
why should one hand travel a greater distant just to clap?
such actions will just bring anger in the victim thus bringing forth the need to get even.
which would then lead the significant other to retaliate.
The cycle repeats itself till one of them breaks.
If the other refuse to piece the broken parts together, thats the end.
turns out to be a lose-lose situation."

- from mr aki

bro that's deep lah..

but my left hand have to travel up down the neck while my right hand "jeng-jeng-jeng" only..but still can communicate..
 
i see people bring their partners to jamming sessions.
i myself bring my boyfriend for jamming.
he would do likely.
yes akisan.
you are right.
its about planning the right schedule.
ive been to some friend's jamming session.
their partners were around.
but they often pull long faces.
haha i wonder.
not an avid music listener?
maybe.
selfish?
maybe.
 
"but my left hand have to travel up down the neck while my right hand "jeng-jeng-jeng" only..but still can communicate.."

thats fuzz for you.

then again, thats because your in your comfort zone. every tried switching the roles of the hands?
life is uncertain, unexpected things happen. Changes happens all the time. How you adapt to the change is what matters.
though external factors does affect the outcome and by that i meant peers,
it is you(again metaphoricly speaking) who has to walk the road.
Might be a T-junction or a cross-junction; who knows?

as for what princess darfy said,
I guess it cant be helped if they are not part of the action now would it.
you cant really blame them now could you?
Maybe they ARE not avid listeners of such music being played or maybe they are,
even so given time one is sure to grow weary of just watching.


Of course there are cases of jealousy and envy whereas the significant other watches how their partner is having so much fun, smile and laughter with the band in comparison to her/him.

then again, its would be the partner's fault now would it? for not making the signficant other feel special?

of course not to forget how some band members just cant get along with non-band members.

so who is to blame?
To whom shall we point fingers at?
 
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