I think it is a good try. Definite an improvement from your previous ones. I can see those scores helped you! My opinion is that at this stage, it is OK not to be too "original" - we learn by emulating what we hear and read from scores. My 2 cents:
1. Piano intro very Elfmanish. OK as intro.
2. Good try in trying to get different melodic themes to be played by different instruments. However, becareful when too many themes comes in together as one. Sometimes, it can create messiness.
3. Try to avoid block chords when writing string parts, particularly triads. I can't hear very clearly (beause there was quite a bit of noise from other instruments), but that may have happened at one point. But I may be wrong - it may be violins at the lower registers together with higher registers of cello thereby creating the "block chord" effect. If you really are going to do it, sequence one part at a time. That means, sequence the first violins, then the second violins, then the violas etc. When you do this, each section will not sound like they are playing on the same second - this will create realism.
4. Interesting in adding delay to the flute. Because flute is part of the whole (ie the orchestra), it should be in the same hall with the same effect. If you want the delay effect, may I suggest using the pan flute? But this is minor - depends on personal preference.
I think you did well. Just one more thing - build the theme on a melody line instead of chord progressions. Keep on writing!
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