We've spent thousands of dollars taking lessons and buying gears, but i dare say only 1 in 10 musicians ever break even by making their music earn income.
the other 9 out of 10 tell themselves its only a hobby.
thats not to say that hobbies are gay. hobbies make us smile and provide us entertainment when our girlfriends are out of town while we're nursing a broken right wrist.
yes that's right, hobbies bring us the same remunerations as masturbation: a smile on our faces and not a cent in our pockets.
as i approach the big 30 in age, the thirst for making money has gripped me hard. blame it on my shotgun marriage to my 17 year old girlfriend, my flashy Mazda RX8 whose parking i cannot afford to pay, and 300 relatives in the Philippines eager to suck my on Singapore dollars like Annabel Chong on aphrodisiacs.
I'm kidding of course. It's not an RX8, it's an R8.
Anyhoo, in my pursuit of monetary returns i have begun to question what could make me the most money with the least amount of work. My conclusions are such:
- Be a bookie
- Be a pornstar
- Write an article on soft.com telling people to throw money my way
Notice that none of those have anything to do with music per se. Which leads me to my point: To make money through music, you'd have to look attractive, which still doesn't have anything to do with music.
You can disagree, but you are wrong and probably a retard. If you still think you're right, i'm here to offer you my specialized 4-day course called "How to prove that money could be made through music" for a low fee of S$3,999.
Order today and i'll throw in a free preview seminar "How masturbation can also make you rich" for no extra charge.
As for the rest of you folks who are still sore at having spent thousands of dollars on your music, here's a tested and proven (albeit saturated) way to make some money:
Open your own jamming studio lah dey!
As for me? I'm selling all my gear and going into seminars and talks. I'm quitting the music scene. I'll probably make my millions telling people how to make THEIR millions through music.
Come on, come on. Throw your money my way.
(The writer is a self-proclaimed Singaporean musician who cannot play an instrument to save his own life. He is single, does not drive a car and whose only relation to the Philippines is through the maid of his next door neighbour.)
the other 9 out of 10 tell themselves its only a hobby.
thats not to say that hobbies are gay. hobbies make us smile and provide us entertainment when our girlfriends are out of town while we're nursing a broken right wrist.
yes that's right, hobbies bring us the same remunerations as masturbation: a smile on our faces and not a cent in our pockets.
as i approach the big 30 in age, the thirst for making money has gripped me hard. blame it on my shotgun marriage to my 17 year old girlfriend, my flashy Mazda RX8 whose parking i cannot afford to pay, and 300 relatives in the Philippines eager to suck my on Singapore dollars like Annabel Chong on aphrodisiacs.
I'm kidding of course. It's not an RX8, it's an R8.
Anyhoo, in my pursuit of monetary returns i have begun to question what could make me the most money with the least amount of work. My conclusions are such:
- Be a bookie
- Be a pornstar
- Write an article on soft.com telling people to throw money my way
Notice that none of those have anything to do with music per se. Which leads me to my point: To make money through music, you'd have to look attractive, which still doesn't have anything to do with music.
You can disagree, but you are wrong and probably a retard. If you still think you're right, i'm here to offer you my specialized 4-day course called "How to prove that money could be made through music" for a low fee of S$3,999.
Order today and i'll throw in a free preview seminar "How masturbation can also make you rich" for no extra charge.
As for the rest of you folks who are still sore at having spent thousands of dollars on your music, here's a tested and proven (albeit saturated) way to make some money:
Open your own jamming studio lah dey!
As for me? I'm selling all my gear and going into seminars and talks. I'm quitting the music scene. I'll probably make my millions telling people how to make THEIR millions through music.
Come on, come on. Throw your money my way.
(The writer is a self-proclaimed Singaporean musician who cannot play an instrument to save his own life. He is single, does not drive a car and whose only relation to the Philippines is through the maid of his next door neighbour.)
