hmm...ok here goes..
Pianist:
Often a reclusive, hard-worked teenager and soon to be eccentric adult who has spent much of his youth practicing Hanon, Dohnyanyi (spell?) Clementi, Buona Vista, Commonwealth.. (ok u get the point)
Finished his grade 8 at 8 years of age, LRSM at 12, FRSM at 15, honorary masters at 20
An individual who prides himself on being able to play Bach, Beethoven, Mozart, Chopin, Rachmaninoff, Brahms, Liszt, Rautavaara, Marty Brunderly, Joey Jo-Jo Shabadoo, and other avant-garde shit that we've never even heard off.
Is often atas, an egoist, and gay
Uses the fact that he is an..ahem..pianist..to get to girls (and boys...)
Suffers from acute sinusitis, throws tantrums and mood swings when his fish is slightly dry, when his glass of water is slightly warm, or when his piano's A=439.99999Hz, instead of 440Hz
Thinks Maksim and Richard Clay(der)man, as well as Vanessa Mae in a broader context, are all traitors of the purist, classical doctrine and as a result, are blatant abominations and an insult to their music profession (usually cuz they can't earn as much as these popular icons -grin-)
Sees pop as the world's greatest sin and evil, and should be avoided at all costs, failing which their ears will burst a thousand explosions and their (male) genitals rendered sterile
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Keyboardist
Usually an outwardly-friendly, extroverted, fun loving person, often found in the form of mats, thambis, ah bengs and ang mohs, all with one thing in common - they wear their shirts unbuttoned from the top so as to show off their manly chest hair, as well as their long sleeves folded up their arms in typical PCK style
Doesn't have a BLUES' clue of what an "adagio piu mosso" means, but can do a damn good job at playing said genre.
Can also improvise, play by ear, play jazz, as well as three of his girlfriends at a time, often to great satisfaction.
As above, doesn't need to state that he is a "pianist," or "keyboardist" to get girls - he performs enough in popular places out of the concert hall for Singapore's young, nubile and ignorant to "get it."
Are a result of pianists with personality, like myself. Minus the gay.
Doesn't need to care if his keyboard is A=440 or A=10000000001 because he's playing a friggin electronic device
Thrives on the fact that Jazz + Funk = Junk, and often makes a good show of it too.
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disclaimer: the above statements were meant to be stereotypical, exaggerated satirical jokes and are not meant to be taken seriously. No flaming, offense, insults and marginalizations were intended, and I apologise if anyone has taken this to heart